Mary, Mary


“They asked her, ‘Woman, why are you crying?’  ‘They have taken my Lord away,’ she said, ‘and I don’t know where they have put him.’ At this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, but she did not realize that it was Jesus.

‘Woman,’ he said, ‘why are you crying?  Who is it you are looking for?’

Thinking he was the gardener, she said, ‘Sir if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him.’

Jesus said to her, “Mary.”

She turned toward him and cried out in Aramaic, ‘Rabboni!’ (which means Teacher).”

I sent out a mass text to my friends tonight.  The question?  What is your interpretation of why Mary Magdelene didn’t know Jesus until He said her name at the empty tomb? (not verbatim)

I got lots of different responses.  The majority, though, was that she was stressed.  She just didn’t recognize Him.  I get that.  I do.  My next question back to them was this:  But it says “She turned around and saw Jesus standing there, but she did not realize it was Jesus.”  She had a short conversation with him.  He addresses her as, “Woman” and asks why she’s crying and who she’s looking for.  It also says she thought He was the gardener.  The instant, though, that He says her name, she screams “Rabboni!”

It was Jesus.

She knew.  He said her name, and she knew.  They had spoken right before that.  She looked at Him.  She heard His voice.  But when He said her name, she knew.

Why?  What was it about him saying her name?  I honestly don’t have a clue.

I know that death is a high-stress time.  Sometimes you’re not totally with it.  Sometimes even when you’re having a conversation with someone, you might not realize what you’re saying or remember it later.  I’ve been there.  Heck, death doesn’t have to be involved and still I sometimes don’t remember I’ve talked to someone or remember anything about the conversation.

I get it.  I really do.  But what is it about hearing someone you love, someone you’ve shared part of your life with, say your name?  The sound is always sweeter coming from those who are dear to you.  Let’s face it.  Julie is a pretty popular name.  I’m probably not going to turn around unless I recognize the voice of the one who calls.  But sometimes when someone you love says your name, you just wake up.  Mary thought all hope was lost and then He, the one who came to heal the broken in this world, said her name.  Hope was restored, not just to her, but to the world.

Maybe, as one of my friends said, she was looking so hard for Jesus, and even though He was right there, she missed the obvious.  He was right in front of her.  The One she had been searching was right there, calling her name.

I’m interested in discussing this with you.  Please comment.  Let me know what you think.  Like I said above, I really don’t know.  But I definitely want to know what you all think!

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The Morning After


1 Corinthians 15:55 O death, where [is] thy sting? O grave, where [is] thy victory?

So it’s the morning after Easter.  The morning after all of our hopes were renewed.  The morning after love won.

How do you feel?

Did you wake up to texts from your friends saying “He is risen!”?

Was your facebook live feed page full of people reminding you why we celebrate Easter?

Or are you in a sugar coma from all of the chocolate that you indulged in?

Or do you remember more what the Easter Bunny brought for you or your family?

I’ll be the first to admit, I’m a little sad that I don’t get an easter basket any longer.  I’ll also be the first to admit that I dwell more on that than the fact that Christ rose to give me new life.

After not having sugar for 40 days, I indulged some yesterday…then spent most of the evening in the bathroom not feeling well.  I’m sorry.  It’s a little gross.  But it’s true.

Our message yesterday morning was about remembering and celebrating.  How we have no problem retelling a joke or a good story.  Those are easy and fun to tell.  But this thing, the one thing that we have between us and an eternity in hell, we don’t share?  Man, I am soooo guilty of this.  I love telling a story.  I love writing a good story.  But when it comes to THE story, the one hat gives us grace and a hope for a better today, I waiver.

This is the story we should crave to hear over and over and over again.

This is the story we should crave to tell. over and over and over again.

So this morning as I’m sitting here trying to get over the sugar-induced headache/stomach ache, while I’m trying to be a little more productive than usual, while I’m going about my day as if nothing is special or new, I’m trying to remember that this is the morning after.  The morning after my life was saved.  The morning after the sting of death was removed.  The morning after Jesus stirred for the first time in three days and hope was renewed.

What are you going to do with your morning after?

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The Ultimate Sacrifice


So if you read my last post, you know that I gave us sugar for Lent.  It’s just a little after noon today, Easter Sunday, and so far I’ve had a donut for breakfast and a few spoonfuls of my favorite ice cream that I recently found again at our local grocery story.   I bought six containers of it.  Last time they quit selling it for two years, so this time I decided to stock up a little.  You just can’t beat Starbucks Java Chip Frappacino.  Yummy coffee/chocolatey goodness.

I was pretty proud of myself.

It’s crazy when I think about giving up sugar as some sort of sacrifice.  I had a friend who gave up soda and coffee, and last night she made the comment that I hope she won’t mind me sharing.   It kind of embodies where I was at during this whole process.  I’m paraphrasing her statement, but basically it was this:  Lent has become more about counting down the days until I can have soda and coffee again instead of drawing closer to Jesus.

I’m right there with her.

I was really looking forward to that ice cream this morning.

It’s days like today, Easter, that I really try to take a deep look at where I am and where I’m going spiritually.  Let’s face it.  My sacrifice of sugar is nothing.  NOTHING.  Today it serves to me as a reminder.  A reminder that there is nothing that I can do to make myself worthy of His great love and grace.  Nothing that I can say, no person I can help no sacrifice made.  Nothing.

His death paid my debt.

His resurrection gave me new life.

And there’s nothing I’ve done to deserve it.

Thank you, Jesus.

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10 Things I've Learned About Myself…Since The Last Time I Learned About Myself


Man, what a convoluted title.  Maybe next time it will be 10 things I’ve learned about myself since the last time I learned about myself since the last time I learned about myself.

Maybe not.

I liked this post so much that I thought I’d revive it again for Good Friday.  Hope you enjoy a new list of lessons as much as I enjoyed writing them!!

1.  My hair will never cooperate with me.  It’s useless.  When I want it to flip out, it curls under.  When I want it to curl under, it flips out. And then with all this wind and stuff in the rainy season, it’s virtually pointless.  Maybe I’ll shave my head.

2.  I like sunny days way better than dreary days, but sometimes a dreary day is exactly what I need.  Put on the Carole King, Patti Griffin & JJ Heller, clean the house, do laundry or just sit and veg…and be thankful that I can.

3.  It’s NBA Postseason.  Reminds me how much I hate the NBA.  That’s all.

4.  But it is baseball season!  Go Cubbies!  Maybe I’ll hit up a Cardinals/Cubs game over in St. Louis this year.  Sounds like a plan.

5.  I hate, I mean really hate taxes.  I’ve had one year in my whole adult working career that I haven’t had to pay in extra at the end of the tax year.  One year.  Oh, well.  I guess it’s better than letting the government use my extra money for their misguided programs that they fund and hoping they’ll have some left over to give me a refund. (That’s all I’m saying on the subject)

6.  I’ve started trying to wear my contacts again.  I’m having to wear them a few hours more each day than I did the last.  Looks like my ten-year hiatus from contacts is making me realize how hard it is to get back into something that should have been a regularity in my daily life.  Hmmm…sounds like I might be able to post about that sometime.

7.  I gave up sugar for Lent.  I thought it would be one of the hardest things I’d done.  It was actually pretty easy.  I’ve only craved it a couple times in the last 37 days.   Makes me think that this should maybe become a way of life?  Trying to decide now what I’ll cut out of my diet next that really doesn’t need to be there in the first place.  Grains maybe?  I do love me some bread.

8.  In all seriousness, though, my efforts to get more active are falling way short.  I really find myself wanting to run a 5k with my friend Cathy this July, but I’m doubting myself…and then I see the videos of the Biggest Losers doing a 5k their first week at the ranch.  Surely I can do it.  Geez.

9.  In my head the distance between who I am and who I want to be is this huge gap.  In reality, the distance between who I am and who God wants me to be is the thing I really need to be considering.  And for Him, distance is nothing.

10.  It’s Good Friday.  Everywhere churches are bringing in Bible scholars, new lights for the stages, breaking out new songs and going to extra mile to make Easter service the best service people have ever been to.  It’s got me thinking a lot about what Jesus did this week before His death.  He went off with His friends.  He encouraged them.  He didn’t put on a show and try to be anything that He wasn’t.  He built relationships that people still talk about and study.  Kinda makes me that maybe we’re missing the point a little.  Maybe it’s not about the flashy lights or the rockin music (as much as I love it all).  Maybe it’s about being honest with people, letting them know we’re flawed and letting them know we have walked and will continue to walk with them.  A life reflecting Jesus, isn’t that the message we’re supposed to be living?

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10 Things I’ve Learned About Myself…Since The Last Time I Learned About Myself


Man, what a convoluted title.  Maybe next time it will be 10 things I’ve learned about myself since the last time I learned about myself since the last time I learned about myself.

Maybe not.

I liked this post so much that I thought I’d revive it again for Good Friday.  Hope you enjoy a new list of lessons as much as I enjoyed writing them!!

1.  My hair will never cooperate with me.  It’s useless.  When I want it to flip out, it curls under.  When I want it to curl under, it flips out. And then with all this wind and stuff in the rainy season, it’s virtually pointless.  Maybe I’ll shave my head.

2.  I like sunny days way better than dreary days, but sometimes a dreary day is exactly what I need.  Put on the Carole King, Patti Griffin & JJ Heller, clean the house, do laundry or just sit and veg…and be thankful that I can.

3.  It’s NBA Postseason.  Reminds me how much I hate the NBA.  That’s all.

4.  But it is baseball season!  Go Cubbies!  Maybe I’ll hit up a Cardinals/Cubs game over in St. Louis this year.  Sounds like a plan.

5.  I hate, I mean really hate taxes.  I’ve had one year in my whole adult working career that I haven’t had to pay in extra at the end of the tax year.  One year.  Oh, well.  I guess it’s better than letting the government use my extra money for their misguided programs that they fund and hoping they’ll have some left over to give me a refund. (That’s all I’m saying on the subject)

6.  I’ve started trying to wear my contacts again.  I’m having to wear them a few hours more each day than I did the last.  Looks like my ten-year hiatus from contacts is making me realize how hard it is to get back into something that should have been a regularity in my daily life.  Hmmm…sounds like I might be able to post about that sometime.

7.  I gave up sugar for Lent.  I thought it would be one of the hardest things I’d done.  It was actually pretty easy.  I’ve only craved it a couple times in the last 37 days.   Makes me think that this should maybe become a way of life?  Trying to decide now what I’ll cut out of my diet next that really doesn’t need to be there in the first place.  Grains maybe?  I do love me some bread.

8.  In all seriousness, though, my efforts to get more active are falling way short.  I really find myself wanting to run a 5k with my friend Cathy this July, but I’m doubting myself…and then I see the videos of the Biggest Losers doing a 5k their first week at the ranch.  Surely I can do it.  Geez.

9.  In my head the distance between who I am and who I want to be is this huge gap.  In reality, the distance between who I am and who God wants me to be is the thing I really need to be considering.  And for Him, distance is nothing.

10.  It’s Good Friday.  Everywhere churches are bringing in Bible scholars, new lights for the stages, breaking out new songs and going to extra mile to make Easter service the best service people have ever been to.  It’s got me thinking a lot about what Jesus did this week before His death.  He went off with His friends.  He encouraged them.  He didn’t put on a show and try to be anything that He wasn’t.  He built relationships that people still talk about and study.  Kinda makes me that maybe we’re missing the point a little.  Maybe it’s not about the flashy lights or the rockin music (as much as I love it all).  Maybe it’s about being honest with people, letting them know we’re flawed and letting them know we have walked and will continue to walk with them.  A life reflecting Jesus, isn’t that the message we’re supposed to be living?

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Ah, Sweet Redemption


“But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, for it is light that makes everything visible.  This is why it is said:  ‘Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you’.” Ephesians 5:13-14

Another line of storms heading through the area tonight.  I hate storms in the night.  I’d rather be able to see something coming in the distance than wake up to have it right on top of me because I didn’t know it was coming.  Granted, I know it’s coming, but I’m not going to be able to watch it’s progress in the sky for a few miles till it gets here.  I’ve posted my thoughts on life with a radar or something like that before.  Tonight, I just want it to be visible.

Ever had an “aha” moment?  You know, the moment where you finally realize what may be going on.  I had one the other day. I was making plans for a trip to Catalyst Dallas in the near future.  I was pretty excited about it, too.  All of a sudden my conscience starts speaking to me.  Um, What about getting-out-of-debt-thing first?  Isn’t that what we’ve been working on for so long?  I thought you were passionate about this.  Do we need to go over this one more time?

But I rrreeeaaaalllllyyyy want to go!  This place is going to be rockin.  Oh, aanndd I’m going to see a friend there, too, so really I’m going to this awesome conference and getting to see a friend so it’s a joint venture.  Well worth the money.

Yes.  It may be worth the money, but what is our biggest goal here?  You’re going to be able to see your friend any time you want once you have no debt.  And this conference?  They have it three times a year in different parts of the country.

But Bianca Juarez is going to be there, and she’s thinking of having this coffee meet and greet thing that I really want to go to.

Yeah.  I act like a little child in my head.  Sometimes A lot of the time it even works its way out.

What a lot of things are coming back to at this point in my life is this:  Is this a necessity?  Is this a priority?  Or is this something I’m just wanting to do?

God has been blessing my real estate business tremendously these past few months.  I guess Fairfield hasn’t got the memo that we’re in a recession.  I don’t know.  I love it.  I’m thankful for it.

I feel like I’m kind of on the verge.  Of what, I don’t know, but still on the verge of something.  This new project I’m working on combined with other things happening in my life, I just feel expectantly restless.  I feel like God is saying, Hey.  We’ve been working on this debt thing for a few years now.  That part of your life was a product of your depression in that season.  You’re not there now, so why is this stuff lingering?  You’ve had opportunities to make great strides at it, and sometimes you’ve made the right decisions.  Sometimes you haven’t.  But I’ve got other things in mind for you.  And they’re coming soon.  Let’s get this taken care of so there’s nothing holding you back.  You ready?

Am I ready?  Most days, yes.  I’m actually pretty stoked. (can you say that without being a stoner or former stoner?)  Some days, honestly, it scares me to death.  This place I’m at right now at this moment is a good one.  I’m happy here, happier than I’ve ever been.  To imagine changing some dynamic of that scares me a little.

Do you trust Me?

Ouch.

Want to talk a little bit about our Redeeming God?  By July 2 if all closings happen according to plan, I will be debt-free.  Through all my brokenness, all my complaining and all my impulsiveness, God is bringing me through.  And I am so thankful.

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There's a little bit of hooker in all of us


I love the movie, Pretty Woman.  I’d say it’s a reasonable assumption that most of us reading this post know the premise of the movie.  Rich guy picks up a hooker, falls in love with her and then rides up to rescue her from the lifestyle.  It’s a great movie.  It’s a modern-day fairy tale…except the whole hooker part.

In the movie Julia Roberts portrays a woman caught in a lifestyle that she never imagined for herself.  She was at a place she had never wanted to know, but at this point in her life, it was what she was comfortable with.  It was the only way she knew of to survive.

Ever feel like that?

Maybe you haven’t ever thought hooking would be the only way for you to survive, but what about the job you’re working?  Do you love it?  Is it comfortable?

What about your relationships?  Do you show and receive love or are you just staying around because it’s hard to find real friends that will really love you and that you can love?  Are we really committing to anything, or are we just staying with what we know solely because we’re surviving?

What about when you’ve had a bad day?  Do you start off running your mouth or do you stuff it full of comfort food?  The term “comfort food” in and of itself should tell you it’s probably not the thing you should be eating at that very moment.

Why do we do these things?  Are they good?  Are they comfortable?  Are they safe?

Do we just go into survival mode simply because it’s easier?  I’m tired of just existing.  Seriously.  Maybe I’ve been on a little bit of a theme lately.  I dunno.

Psalm 119:76 “May Your unfailing love be my comfort according to Your promise to Your servant.”

2 Corinthians 1:6-7 “If we are distressed, it is for Your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for Your comfort, which produces in You patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer.  And our hope for You is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.”

How many times do I run away from Jesus seeking comfort?  I know I’ve quoted C.S. Lewis in The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe before about Mr. Beaver telling Lucy that of course Aslan wasn’t safe.  But he was good.

I know what it feels like to be doing one thing while you’re heart it somewhere else.  I know what it’s like to stay there just because it’s what you know and what feels safe.  I know what it’s like to go shopping and to eat ice cream just because it makes you feel better for a little bit.  And even though it doesn’t make you feel better for the long-term, just feeling better for a tiny second is better than not feeling at all.  I also know what it’s like to wonder if there is any life left in you, when you feel like the world in all the hurt and pain has just kicked you in the gut.

But then I know what it’s like to start to feel again.  It didn’t matter that what I was feeling was pain, but the fact that I was feeling something was a huge relief.  I know the work it took and is still taking to claw your way out of that deep pit of despair disguised as debt and laziness or whatever the disguise may be.

I know.

And so does He.

And then I know what it feels like to take the step that changed my whole world.  I took the path that wasn’t safe.  It was a little lot scary.  I had no idea how it was going to work, but I knew it was something I had to do.  I stepped off that street corner, away from everything I’d ever worked for and had ever known.

I’ve never been happier.  I feel hurt and pain every day.  But the best part about it is is that I’m able to feel love and give love every day.  I woke up.

Every day is a little better than the day before.  I have to make an effort to look to Jesus for my comfort.  It’s not always easy.  I’m still trying to lose the weight I put on in the dark years.  I’m still working my way out of debt, but I’m focused.  There is a goal.  God is my comfort.

Let’s face it.  We’re really all the same, as different as we are.  We struggle with things.  We take the easy way out because, well, it’s easy.  We take the safe way, because it’s the way we know.  We’re afraid to be who we really are because, really, what if they think I’m weird?

God is my comfort.  He made me, and because of that, I am enough.

Besides, we’re all here in the same boat, ’cause like I said earlier, There’s a little hooker in all of us.

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There’s a little bit of hooker in all of us


I love the movie, Pretty Woman.  I’d say it’s a reasonable assumption that most of us reading this post know the premise of the movie.  Rich guy picks up a hooker, falls in love with her and then rides up to rescue her from the lifestyle.  It’s a great movie.  It’s a modern-day fairy tale…except the whole hooker part.

In the movie Julia Roberts portrays a woman caught in a lifestyle that she never imagined for herself.  She was at a place she had never wanted to know, but at this point in her life, it was what she was comfortable with.  It was the only way she knew of to survive.

Ever feel like that?

Maybe you haven’t ever thought hooking would be the only way for you to survive, but what about the job you’re working?  Do you love it?  Is it comfortable?

What about your relationships?  Do you show and receive love or are you just staying around because it’s hard to find real friends that will really love you and that you can love?  Are we really committing to anything, or are we just staying with what we know solely because we’re surviving?

What about when you’ve had a bad day?  Do you start off running your mouth or do you stuff it full of comfort food?  The term “comfort food” in and of itself should tell you it’s probably not the thing you should be eating at that very moment.

Why do we do these things?  Are they good?  Are they comfortable?  Are they safe?

Do we just go into survival mode simply because it’s easier?  I’m tired of just existing.  Seriously.  Maybe I’ve been on a little bit of a theme lately.  I dunno.

Psalm 119:76 “May Your unfailing love be my comfort according to Your promise to Your servant.”

2 Corinthians 1:6-7 “If we are distressed, it is for Your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for Your comfort, which produces in You patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer.  And our hope for You is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.”

How many times do I run away from Jesus seeking comfort?  I know I’ve quoted C.S. Lewis in The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe before about Mr. Beaver telling Lucy that of course Aslan wasn’t safe.  But he was good.

I know what it feels like to be doing one thing while you’re heart it somewhere else.  I know what it’s like to stay there just because it’s what you know and what feels safe.  I know what it’s like to go shopping and to eat ice cream just because it makes you feel better for a little bit.  And even though it doesn’t make you feel better for the long-term, just feeling better for a tiny second is better than not feeling at all.  I also know what it’s like to wonder if there is any life left in you, when you feel like the world in all the hurt and pain has just kicked you in the gut.

But then I know what it’s like to start to feel again.  It didn’t matter that what I was feeling was pain, but the fact that I was feeling something was a huge relief.  I know the work it took and is still taking to claw your way out of that deep pit of despair disguised as debt and laziness or whatever the disguise may be.

I know.

And so does He.

And then I know what it feels like to take the step that changed my whole world.  I took the path that wasn’t safe.  It was a little lot scary.  I had no idea how it was going to work, but I knew it was something I had to do.  I stepped off that street corner, away from everything I’d ever worked for and had ever known.

I’ve never been happier.  I feel hurt and pain every day.  But the best part about it is is that I’m able to feel love and give love every day.  I woke up.

Every day is a little better than the day before.  I have to make an effort to look to Jesus for my comfort.  It’s not always easy.  I’m still trying to lose the weight I put on in the dark years.  I’m still working my way out of debt, but I’m focused.  There is a goal.  God is my comfort.

Let’s face it.  We’re really all the same, as different as we are.  We struggle with things.  We take the easy way out because, well, it’s easy.  We take the safe way, because it’s the way we know.  We’re afraid to be who we really are because, really, what if they think I’m weird?

God is my comfort.  He made me, and because of that, I am enough.

Besides, we’re all here in the same boat, ’cause like I said earlier, There’s a little hooker in all of us.

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I Want To Get Lost


“This is what the Lord says:  Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.”

~ Jeremiah 6:16

I read this first verse in 1 Corinthians earlier this week and really wanted to write something about it, but couldn’t really ever find the right words.  Then I wanted to write a little bit about how wonderful my little escape was for my soul, and I couldn’t find the words.  It’s amazing how quickly they come when I get quiet.  I think I’ve posted about that before.  Why do I forget so easily?

I was talking to a friend last night about how nice it sometimes it just to be alone and be quiet.  I basically just said, you know, I live alone.  When I want alone time, I just go home.  What I didn’t realize, though, is how much I needed to get away.  I needed to go where the only responsibility was to get up the next morning.  I didn’t have any dishes to wash, any laundry piling up in my hamper or yard to neglect mowing.  I was free to do whatever I wanted.  No responsibilities for just a few short hours.  Man, that was good.  Good rest for my soul.

I hate to imagine how often I go looking for rest in the wrong places.  The times that I just need to get quiet, I move towards the noise.  The times I need fellowship, I run away from the crowd.  I’ve ended up going down the paths that I choose and end up in the places that I don’t want to be, the places that end in hurt and pain.  My heart hardens again because I insist on finding my own way.

When will I learn?

Will I ever get it right?

Then there have been the times that I’ve given up trying to do it myself…and He gives me rest.  He gives me the exact thing I need, whether it’s rest or whether is good company or whatever the case may be.

The fact of the matter is, is that when I choose the good way, His path, I have rest.  And it is good.

It’s not good because it’s what I need, although that is pretty awesome.

It’s good because I rest in Him.

I put my trust and my faith and finally realize, once again, that His way is the only way that I can really live.  He’s come to give us life.  He’s come to give us a good life.  I didn’t say an easy life, but a good life.

Let’s face it.  Losing our path for His is the only way to live.

Lord, help me to never forget that.

There’s a song I’ve been listening to a lot lately called I Want To Get Lost by Sanctus Real.  It’s pretty incredible if you’ll listen to it.

“Well I found my way to trouble
I found my way to pain
Oh but I’m so tired of trying
To find my own way
So I wanna get lost
I wanna get lost in Your arms
I wanna get lost
And lose my way into Your heart
‘Cause there’s so many voices
Telling me how to get lost in this life
So right now I wanna get lost in You
Before I lose myself” ~ Sanctus Real

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I Am Enough


I bought a necklace the other day.  I’d been looking at it for a while.  Did I need it?  No.  Did I want it?  Yes.  But I kept putting off the purchase for one reason or another.  I’m not really sure why.  Let me show you a picture of it and see if you can figure it out.  Also, go to the website to check out their other stuff.

What do you think?

Yeah.  I know I’m not really a pink girl, and I’m usually not a necklace girl, but those aren’t really the reasons.  My reason?

Do I believe it?

Do you?

We’re living in a society where we’re constantly told and showed that we’re not enough, that we’re not quite there, whether it be physically, emotionally or spiritually.

Yeah.  I’ve lost a few pounds, but I’m not a size 2 yet and I don’t look like the girls on the magazines.

Okay.  Yes.  I’m starting to get my head on straight for the first time in a long time, but look at her.  She’s on it.  She’s the one I want to be like.

You’re right.  That was a very touching prayer I just prayed, but did you hear what he said?  Man, I felt God move when he spoke.  That’s how I want to pray.

We’re constantly bombarded by the pictures of who we’re supposed to be that sometimes we forget that we were created for something special.  It’s special because it was created for us.  And only us.  God created you and me one at a time.  We’re not alike and the more we try to be, the more we lose who we were created to be.

Yes.  I would like to look like Julia Roberts.  I’d like to have it all together for once.  And I’d like to pray like Billy Graham.

But that’s not who I am.

I get caught up in trying to say the right things and to pray the right prayers that will change the lives of those around me that I forget that it’s not about me.  I need to step back and let God do His thing.  And by letting Him come in and take over I become more and more like the person He created me to be.

I become enough.

So here goes.  Hi.  My name is Julie.  I like basketball, strawberry-pretzel salad and a great new movie, usually of the romantic comedy genre.  I don’t like confrontation, too-cold temperatures or too-hot temperatures.  I eat too much most of the time.  I don’t exercise enough.  I’d play guitar better if I’d practice more, and my writing really suffers when I’m not in the Word.  My musical interests range from Hillsong to Heart, from Poison to Passion and from Janis Joplin to Jars of Clay.  If you would happen to stop by my house and I’m not expecting you, it will probably be messy, and I’ll probably be talking to myself trying to get motivated to clean or work out.  I’d like to write a book at some point in my life…hopefully soon.  I sometimes don’t like myself when I look in the mirror.  The longer I know Jesus, though, the more I like who He created.  The sins I struggle with, I’ve struggled with for years.  Sometimes I feel like I’m not worth putting effort into, but then I hear a little whisper that I am.  He created me.  And because He created me I know one thing for sure.

I Am Enough.

Because of who He is.

I. Am. Enough.

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